She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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