We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
