That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
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