i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
