Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
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Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
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