The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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