and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
We are all done wearing pants today
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
