i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize