Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
