Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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