He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Holy sore nipples Batman
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
