Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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