I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
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