Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
