Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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