We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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