Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(703): View more from Virginia

i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)

Fav 21 2209 743
share tweet
(706): View more from Georgia

so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess

Fav 88 1027 5724
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(517): View more from Michigan

My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?

Fav 62 1107 4467
share tweet
(218): View more from Minnesota

Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.

Fav 44 8477 2956
share tweet
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(517): View more from Michigan

Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.

Fav 5 975 3240
share tweet
(850): View more from Florida

No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....

Fav 9 3149 1427
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(512): View more from Texas

Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.

Fav 20 4536 1456
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(209): View more from California

I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.

Fav 1 679 400
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(425): View more from Washington

Hungover. No words. Just memes.

Fav 2 55 14
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT