remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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