Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
