Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize