I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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