Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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