Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
