Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize