If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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