I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
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