"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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