Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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