who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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