they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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