Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
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