We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
