im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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