I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
