Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Randomize
