Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
