So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
operation harelip BJ is a go
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Randomize
