oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Randomize
