I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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