Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Randomize
