Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
My penis needs a shock collar
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
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