just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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