Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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