I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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