Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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