She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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