Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
