hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
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Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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