Will you blow on my dice?
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize