Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
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